I joined a gym this week. It’s been long overdue, I have not stepped into a gym since in the midst of the rampant tonsillitis around early August last year.
I’ve snuck onto peoples scales here and there over the months so I knew I wasn’t in peak health or anything but I was a bit overwhelmed to turn up for my fitness assessment and find out I weighed about 5 kilos more than I thought I did. I don’t feel comfortable revealing my weight here but I can tell you that last night when I got home I went online and calculated my BMI and it turns out I have just snuck into the “obese” category.
Awesome. Go me.
I’ve struggled with my weight my whole life. My Grandma once told me that she thinks the problems started soon after my parents divorce – if my two older brothers ate something, I had to have it too. The same amount. Despite the fact that they were four and six years older than me. Over the years I’ve tried most diets, some sensible and a lot of really fucking stupid ones. I’ve mistreated my body – starved it and stuffed it. I’ve had two people on two separate occasions ask me when my baby is due. There are times when I feel just so disgusted about my own body I just want to scratch my skin off of I spend a whole day in the deepest funk that I just weep all day.
My trainer asked me last night if I needed to discuss my diet, but really – what was there to discuss? I know how to eat properly and I actually do most of the time. I actually love healthy food – I just love food too much and I eat too much and sometimes I just feel self-destructive and eat all the wrong things – even though I know I will regret it.
I know what I need to do. Eat less – move more. Why I have such a wall when it actually comes to doing it I don’t know.
Probably the most ridiculous thing is that I am more than capable.
My trainer last night was a bit of a wake-up call for me. He is a Paralympian who was born with cerebral palsy who works at the gym part time while he trains at the Institute of Sport. When I told him that I didn’t want to do step classes as the last time I did it I felt uncoordinated and embarrassed, he pointed out that it’s actually training for my brain so it would help me become more coordinated. He then mentioned that he had started doing step classes as having cerebral palsy means that your brain does not always send the correct signals to the body (hopefully I am not totally botching up this explanation) – so he finds it a useful way of training his brain.
And I don’t like doing it because I get embarrassed. WTF. Meeting someone like him made me realise I shouldn’t have excuses like that – THAT’S EMBARRASSING. He even gave me praise for things I had never considered, but which I now feel oddly proud of – apparently my hips are in exact alignment, I have good posture and my body is very symmetric – which is apparently is quite rare.
So I shall be taking my symmetrical, but chunky, body to the gym at least 3 times a week from now on.
I’ll keep you posted
Hey Lala – which gym did you join?
I really like RPM/spin – you can push at your own rate, and it’s the fastest way to trim tum, butt and thighs.
I also like cardio boxing because you get to hit things, and can work between speed and power (when you’re tired!!!).
You n me both baby!
I joined before Christmas but I have been going properly for about 2 weeks now. Have also been trying to eat more appropriately but still haven’t shifted any weight so I will just have to persist for a little longer before I get some additional inspiration in the form of finally managing to move some of it.
And he is defo right re posture etc being something to be proud of, mine is stuffed (despite the efforts of my osteopath) and on top of the weight issues I now have a screwed up back that pretty much hurts most days too, joy happy joy! Especially when I can’t have anything with aspririn or ibuprofen in it and seem to be developing an intolerance to codeine… DOUBLE YAY! lol I reckon a big part of it is carrying the bloody gigantic bazookas around all day hehehehe! You n me Lala, this is our year to get fit and healthy and happy with our bodies in whatever form they happen to be in eh?
Okay, I’m not being paid to endorse this book or anything but it has helped me and I highly recommend that you get it and read it too: I Can Make You Thin by Paul McKenna. Don’t expect it to work miracles or actually hypnotise you but you sound very similar to me with your weight issues and this book puts things into perspective.
Other than the nutty self help book referral from someone you don’t know on the interweb Good Luck! Enjoy the excercise and you’ll stick with it longer.
I haven’t joined a gym (they are unbelievably expensive here!) but I keep telling myself I’m going to get back to a running routine. I have changed how and what I eat somewhat though. Baby steps. We’ll get there Lala!
You can do it!!
You are a gym bunny!!
You are coordinated!!
Pull finger out of anus and do it do it do it!!
All fired up!!
Woohhoooo!!
And …. if all else fails drink wine and eat chocolate and be happy!!
I just wanna know if you are going to wear funky leg warmers – a la Olivia Newton John?
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